~ DIVA ~
“Don’t be careful. You could hurt yourself.” – Byron Katie
Challenges, risks, open hearts and fearlessness work in your favor. Don’t shy away from taking a leap of faith, even if it scares you. If you do take the plunge, you will never regret a day in your life.
Here’s to making life count.
~ DIVA ~
I sometimes contemplate the concept of fairness. Is it fair that good people suffer?
In that vein, I occasionally think about my abusive ex-boyfriend with regards to the concept of fairness. After all the put-downs, the aggression and downright disrespect, he continues to go through life as though nothing happened, void of any remorse or a sense of wrong-doing (or so it seems).
It’s not fair; not in the slightest. It’s not right that the rest of his friends and family think he’s an emotionally healthy and good-natured man. He got away with it scot-free. It’s not fair that I have to reconcile with this, knowing that I will NEVER get the apology I seek.
These situations aren’t fair, but that doesn’t make them less purposeful to those that suffer the consequences. What I have gained from this is a level of strength that I wouldn’t have otherwise, had he not treated me the way he did.
Fairness and lack thereof can be a difficult pill to swallow. However, bear in mind that life is doing this FOR you and not TO you. The difficulties you face will only hone your character, strengthening your abilities to deal with life’s greater challenges.
Let them go and live your life. Fairness, much like sadness and happiness, comes in waves and is never constant. You will be fine and those ex-abusers just helped you, in the most unlikely of ways, become a stronger and better you.
~ DIVA ~
I recently started taking improvisation comedy classes which might be the gutsiest thing I’ve done in a long time. Challenging yourself by pursuing novel and difficult situations leads to growth and tons of self discovery. The key is to learn how to recognize your own fears and ignore the potential for judgement from others. Once you rid yourself of that, anything can happen!
When I asked a friend for advice on how to deal with the fear of judgement or seeming silly and nervous on stage, he said:
“When you’re on stage, “they” are no longer important. You are. They’re simply watching.”
Use this as a mantra for your life. The opinions of others are as important as you make them. People are simply observers, by default. YOU are the performer and the artist. Don’t fear, be real and be passionate. Follow your heart and perform with everything you’ve got. Trust me, others will applaud you and follow your lead:)
The DIVA Team
Tuesday Morning Jams, Madonna’s “Sorry” is empowering and real. Thinking of all you who are still hearing “apologies” from people who are abusive and treat you poorly. ~DIVA~ xo Hope ox
Seeking counsel after you leave an abusive relationship is something I highly recommend. Speaking to someone who is knowledgeable about the issue can provide sound insight when you’ve been left confused, hurt and, broken.
Recently, I was fortunate to connect with Kellie Jo Holly, advocate against domestic violence and the founder of AbuseJournals.com. I was seeking advice on how to cope with lingering loose-ends, so to speak, of my former verbally abusive relationship, which I had been struggling with for months.
Kellie’s insight gave me the strength I needed to push forward and break the barriers I was imposing upon myself. Being a survivor of verbal abuse and an educated counselor in the field, she was the best resource that I could have found during my time of pain and confusion.
That being said, Kellie has been mentoring for some time now and is growing a base of mentors to help victims of abuse. I encourage you to explore this resource, especially if you’re in need of answers to what may seem, countless questions.
Further, if you want to share your story and hone your counseling skills, be a mentor! There are also opportunities to join her amazing team.
- If you’d like a mentor, the address to visit is http://verbalabusejournals.com/help-with-domestic-abuse/
- The application to be a mentor can be found at: http://verbalabusejournals.com/help-with-domestic-abuse/domestic-violence-survivor-mentors/i-want-to-be-a-survivors-mentor-application/
Thanks for everything, Kellie Jo. Keep up the fantastic work! ❤
The DIVA Team
Our thoughts are with Amanda Berry, Michelle Knight and, Gina DeJesus; three remarkable women of strength, courage and perseverance. Know that you have a worldwide community of women who share your pain and root in the victory of your freedom. From the bottom of our hearts, we wish you all the blessings in life that you deserve.
The DIVA Team
“The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams.” Eleanor Roosevelt
Do you believe in yourself? You should. Everything and anything you want lies within you. Believe, seek it and you shall receive it.
Sometimes, when you leave a bad relationship, you’re left with TONS of existentialist questions to deal with. I, for one, thought that my relationship, as verbally abusive as it was, was the be-all and end-all of my life. I guess that was part of the whole manipulation, right? All that was left for me was marriage, kids and years of resentment. But, I left.
I’m on my own now and my life has taken a course for the “questionable;” not at all in a negative way, but in a very overwhelming, “where will life take me????” kind of way.
I’m sure some of you may be familiar with The Holstee Manifesto. It’s a direct, short and sweet rundown of what matters in life and how to live it well. A message that has been shared over 500,000 times and viewed over 60 million times online.
As a reminder to those that feel lost, downtrodden and discouraged, life has meaning once you start perceiving things differently and doing what you love. I encourage you to follow The Holstee Manifesto and watch your life transform into your own little slice of heaven on earth;)
Find out more about the inspirational Holstee team via the following link: http://shop.holstee.com/pages/about
P.S. I’ll be hanging up my printed manifesto in my room imminently. It’ll be my little daily “prayer.”
There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside of you.~ Maya Angelou
Happy 85th Birthday, Maya:)
Hope you all find the courage to pursue those dreams you hold dear.